It’s been another emotional rollercoaster week. I’m going to cut parts out and skim over others but essentially, this is how it played out…

My husband drove down the coast on Monday night to bring his mother back to Sydney for her scheduled surgery on Tuesday. While he was there, she had a transient ischemic attack (mini-stroke). At one point she stopped breathing and had no pulse. It was only his quick action and medical training that saved her life. Given the all-clear by a swag of doctors, she had her surgery and is due home again today.

We visited her in hospital on Thursday night and due to the girlie-nature of her surgery, her room was in the middle of the maternity section. I don’t do too well when confronted by that sort of thing so I specifically asked if anyone else would be there, and was told no, but when we arrived the brother-in-law was there as well. Anyway, my relationship with the brother-in-law has been strained over the last few years (ever since the day he stood in my kitchen and had the audacity to tell ME to “get a life”; this coming from the man who wasn’t working and has few friends and no interests beyond drinking wine and watching tv) and more so since the birth of our sons. Anyway, the mother-in-law went on a tangent about not being able to pick up her grandson post-surgery healing stage. I didn’t need to hear this. Why not just say “I’ve been told not to lift stuff” rather than “I’ve been told that I can’t lift my grand children, they’ll just have to climb up onto my lap, I could get a little rope and they could pull themselves up like this etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc”.

The husband seems to think that the reason his parents don’t really acknowledge Max or our feelings about him is because they didn’t see him and therefore don’t register the reality of our son. Today when he collects his mother from the hospital and takes her home, he is taking Max with him. Or at least, he’s taking Max’s ashes, his photos and the book containing his feet and hand prints.

I’m not expecting much to come from this but it would be nice if they could understand that while we lost our son five months ago, it feels like it happened yesterday. I just want a little empathy from them. I want them to understand that it hurts me a lot when they prattle on about babies and that they don’t ask me how I’m coping since losing Max (they ask my husband, but never me).

Ok, enough – it’s time to change the record.  Besides, I need a tissue.

Work… I work a major teaching hospital in Sydney. The powers above are blocking our recruitment efforts to save money. We advertised one part-time position in December and interviewed in January.  We found two fantastic applicants. Although our request to recruit was approved, those jerks have stalled the criminal record check stage of the recruitment process so they can “save money”.  We have explained that our need is great, that they approved this position back when we had 2 FTE staff on board.  Now we are down 1 FTE, both of our 0.8 FTE nurses are on leave (guess who is giving patients their blood results; got demarcation issues??) and have two new specialists on staff, and five additional clinics to run. Do the math. They did assign a temp to me and while she is GREAT, she is still very new to the role and everything she does must be checked. She also has a couple of medical issues and often needs to leave early, start late, etc. It’s going to take a couple of weeks to get her up to speed. So those government jerks don’t recognise that while they are “saving money” by delaying recruitment, they are forcing one person to do the work of 2.5 FTE staff without taking into account the increase of clinical staff and activity. To get through the workload, I’m starting early, working through lunch, leaving late (I did 9hrs of unpaid overtime this week alone), getting run down, am unable to take sick leave, and subsequently providing a half-arsed service to our patients.  I’d just like to take this moment to say “Fuck you Labor government”.

I’ve got a lot to do this weekend: a few hours of coding a shop cart modification for a web client, a couple of chapters to read for uni on contract law re franchising and licensing, and four songs to practice before my next piano lesson on Tuesday night. Not bad for someone who doesn’t have a life.

Blantantly stolen from Cora Zane’s blog:

I’m a bit miffed about my score. Clearly living in one of the bigger cities in the world puts me at a distinct disadvantage of surviving a zombie attack. In truth, I’m probably better prepared than most because this was the desk calendar I had last year:

They really should take these things into consideration.

• Piano lessons are going very well so I bought myself a little treat:
• I have had a very productive week as far as knitting goes. I’ve finished the lacy pink and black scarf and a pair of uber cute black Converse Chuck Taylor booties. I’m keen to cast on again but I have no idea what to make next. I’m seriously considering knitting baby items to sell since learning that one of the knitted soakers I made for a friend’s baby fetched over $30 on ebay. And that was as a second-hand item! Not bad for $4 worth of wool and a couple of hours in front of the tv. My thought is that I’m going to knit anyway, I might as well make a little money doing it. And it could provide a nice little income when (if) I’m (ever) at home with a baby.
• Uni starts up again on Monday and I’m quite excited about it. I’ll be taking Commercial Law first up, which looks pretty interesting. Best of all, unlike previous law texts, the textbook isn’t massive; it will actually fit into my regular handbag so I won’t have to carry a separate bag around with me.
• Work was better this week. I have another assistant and she is awesome. The first assistant they gave me came from the temporary staffing pool was relieved from her position after being one hour late on five consecutive days, calling in sick on her sixth day, late again on day seven, then failing to show up or call in on the day eight. Assistant V2.0 is enthusiastic, intelligent, proactive and professional. She’s also wickedly funny and makes an excellent cup of tea.
• Gossip from the ‘hood: A couple of days ago my Korean neighbour side-swiped my other neighbour’s late model green car with their little white shitbox. They exchanged a good amount of paint and did a substantial amount of damage then DROVE OFF! Today they parked their shitbox on the street again but didn’t even attempt to hide the green paint on their own car. She confronted the neighbours but they pulled the “sorry no english” thing, just as they did when I confronted them about flicking cigarette butts onto our lawn. Needless to say, she has taken plenty of photos and involved the police. Ahh, it’s all good in the hood.
• Today my sister and I bought a fabulous variety of birthday presents for our very spoilt and completely gorgeous niece. She turns one tomorrow. Where does the time go?
• While exerting an incredible amount of self-control, I was able to walk straight past the huge Easter egg display at Big W today without pushing my thumb through any of the eggs. I did, however, attempt to hurt a Terry’s Chocolate Orange as part of my personal protest against the combining of hated fake ORANGE flavouring with much loved CHOCOLATE, only to be informed by my sister that said Terry’s Chocolate Orange is actually solid not hollow, and therefore impervious to my thumb. The force is strong with this one.
• I really don’t like my new Remington electric razor. My old one was great but this one is so rough on my skin. Damn you Remington *shakes fist*
• Max’s due date was last Friday. I had really hoped to be pregnant again by now but it obviously wasn’t meant to be. I’m getting really tired of all the deliberate glances towards my belly. Fortunately I’ve managed to lose all the baby weight plus one kilo so there’s nothing to see.

As previously threatened, I finally made it to the Clinique counter today. The only woman working in that section was quick to explain that she didn’t know much about the Clinique products because she was actually a Clarins consultant. Regardless, I knew what I wanted and found my favourite cleanser and moisturiser easily. As we reached the register, I asked if there were any gifts-with-purchase available. She said she knew they had a tote bag available but only if you bought two or more sun products and promptly pulled one off the nearby stand. She said she would check to see what else they were hiding under the counter and returned with a mini bottle of perfume, a toiletries bag containing product samples and another pack of product samples. I expected her to let me pick one but instead she gave me the whole lot with a laugh, a shrug, and a quip about the Clinique consultants not being there to stop her. Ha!

Sydney has been in the midst of a heatwave* for the last week or so but this hasn’t really affected me because I work in an air-conditioned office and drive an air-conditioned car. The temps reached the low 40s (108F+) last weekend but again, I was in air-conditioning so it wasn’t really an issue. Shortly before midnight on Thursday, neither of us could sleep due to the heat so we hit the local supermarket for ice-cream. That litre tub of Sara Lee Ultra Chocolate helped more than you could imagine. :)

When we arrived home from work last night, the air was thick with smoke from the bushfires in Lane Cove National Park and we had to keep our windows closed overnight because of the smell. Today the temps climbed past 40C again and it’s predicted that the temps will hit 46C+ (115F+) tomorrow which will make New South Wales officially the hottest place on the planet. Truly. Even the plains of Africa and the deserts of the Middle East will not be as hot tomorrow. Unbelievable!

Right now I’m laying on the couch, writing this, having just ordered something fun from Amazon and thinking about grabbing an ice-cream sandwich from the freezer and maybe watching a DVD. Heatwave? Bring it on!

* Heatwave = We’re having the most number of 40C days in a row ever recorded.

I was tagged for this by Cora Zane, so here goes!

1. Although I’m a night owl at heart, I almost always go to bed early and usually wake up around 5.30am.
2. I have a diabetic cat – she needs insulin shots twice a day; every day, at the same time.
3. My favourite authors are Jane Austen, Shakespear, Edgar Allen Poe, Neil Gaiman, Michael Romkey, Anne Rice, and most recently Stephenie Meyer.
4. I mostly listen to post-punk, new wave, old skool hip-hop, ska, punk cabaret and electronic/techno.
5. I collect vintage cameras; my favourite is a 1963 Kiev 4A rangefinder.
6. I should take more photos but have been in a photographic funk recently.
7. I’m taking piano lessons.
8. I completely cut coffee out of my diet in May 2008 and feel a lot happier for it.
9. My wedding dress was green.
10. My son Max was born, and died, on 23 September 2008. It was the saddest day of my life.
11. I keep his ashes beside my bed.
12. I have a bat tattoo on my ankle.
13. I have a fetish for necklaces.
14. I also have a bit of a shoe fetish.
15. I wear a belly button ring.
16. I love steampunk; does anyone have the blue prints for turning a zeppelin into a time machine?
17. I’m currently studying towards a Bachelor of Business, with a double-major in Business Management and Law. I was doing accounting as a major but have swapped this to BusMgt because I was bored. Unfortunately this has pushed my graduation date back again.
18. I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.
19. Actually, I’d like to be a vampire when I grow up!
20. But for now, I’m PA to a professor of medicine.
21. My favourite movies are Metropolis (Giorgio Moroder’s version), Allegro non troppo, The Point, everything Hitchcock, and Interview with the Vampire.
22. Although I wear a size 10, I would still like to lose 10kg.
23. But this is a little hard to achieve because I’m somewhat addicted to turkish delight.
24. And ice-cream! Especially ice-cream sandwiches!
25. I far prefer the heat over cold weather. I’ll take 40C days over winter any time!

I’ve been at it again…

And my new favourite: it’s a yummy vintage necklace with a rather large burgundy coloured stone set into an art nouveau pendant. Very neo-Victorian. Love it!

In addition to the butterfly necklace that arrived today, I also received a little bonus from one of my favourite department stores. Apparently I’d clocked up 2000 points on that store’s reward program so they sent me a $20 gift card. I have other gift cards for the same store which are starting to burn a hole in my pocket. Can you hear that?? I’m pretty sure it’s the Clinique counter calling my name!